Ivy
by AnnaMaria12
Summary: She was gone, gone forever. There was nothing left for me to live for, why would I want to live without her. She was everything to me, she was a ray of sunshine in the darkness, my one true love, the only one I would ever want to be with. There is no points left in life without her. This is a variation of Newt's suicide attempt. If you are sensitive about that, then don't read.


**_So this is my first fanfic. I was feeling depressed today so I decided to write a sad story. This is told from Newt's pov and is a variation of his suicide attempt._** ** _Disclaimer: The Maze Runner and all it's characters and ideas belong to James Dashner. The only thing I own is Ivy._**

OoO

"So there really is no girls here," the newbie asked. I did not know his name nor really care.

"No," I answered curtly, thinking back to when she was here.

 ** _Flashback_**

She was laughing as I chased her around the Glade. Her long light brown hair was flowing behind her like a waterfall, her sparkling blue eyes danced with laughter and happiness. She knew she was faster than me, that I could never catch her. Once she got close to the trees she slowed down a considerable amount, and I could not stop myself from crashing into her.

We fell to the soft green grass in an undignified heap of limbs. Somehow she had ended up on top of me. She looked at me and started laughing her ass off. I love her laugh, it's like a million little bells chiming. Once she stoped laughing she looked down at me.

She softly kissed my nose, "Great job Newt. Your so amazingly graceful," she teased.

"I ment to do that," I retorted.

"Sure you did," she told me sarcastically, "It has nothing to do with the fact that I nearly stoped does it."

I chuckled, "Not at all."

She rolled her eyes, "I love you Newtie."

"Yeah, I love me too," I smirked. She gasped and slapped me, but a faint smile was pulling at her lips. "But I love you more," I told her.

"Whatever," she moved to get off me, but I quickly rolled over and pinned her under me. I leaned down and kissed her softly. Soon I felt her kiss me back. I relished in her smell and taste. I wished the kiss could last forever. She smelled like strawberries and tasted like mint and something I could not name.

To soon we had to break for air. Her hands were around me neck and one of my hands was in her hair while the other rested on her hip. I rooled off her and stood up. Then extended my hand out to her and helped her up.

We walked to the kitchen to get lunch hand-in-hand.

 ** _Flashback Over_**

As my mind drew me back to reality I realized that I was on the ground, with my knees pulled up to me chest, crying my eyes out. The newbie was standing next to me with a look on his face that was a mixture of pity, sadness, and disgust.

Alby, realizing what had happened came over and knelt beside me. He looked between me and the newbie before whispering to me, "Newt, come on buddy. It was hard on all of us. You have got to pull yourself together man. Look, go run I'll take care of the greenie. Good that?"

I nodded numbly and walked over to the runner's hut. No, I thought, they don't know anything. They did not know her like I did, love her like I did. They did not have to deal with peices of her lingering everywhere. I grabbed everything I needed to run and ran into the maze.

I though of her. Her smell, her smile, her laugh, her sparkling blue eyes, her long hair, her perfect body, her always happy demeanor, and the way she looked at the world. She would always find the bright side of everything, and would never give up on anything. Then my mind wondered to that last day.

 ** _Flashback_**

"Run, Ivy, RUN!" I screamed at her. She was running towards the Glade with a griever hot on her tail and the doors closing fast. She was getting closer and closer, as were the doors and the griever though. She put on a burst of speed and made it into the Glade but before I could go to her the griever's arm came through the door and snatched her. She screamed as it started to drag her back to the maze.

"IVY!" I screamed running to grab her but was too late. She mouthed an I love you to me before I lost her forever.I spent the night pounding on the doors, crying, calling for Ivy, and praying to the creators to bring her back to me safe.

In the morning I looked into the maze hoping, praying that I would see Ivy, knowing it was wishful thinking. I spotted something on the ground. Bending down to look at it I found that it was the necklace I gave her when we had first started dating. I collapsed to the ground crying and that's exactly where the runners found me later.

 ** _Flashback Over_**

I stopped running, with tears streaming down my face. I looked around everything reminded me of her. There was no point in me living anymore, not without her. There was no happiness without her. I couldn't take this anymore. At least if I was dead I could be with her again.

I started climbing the maze wall. When I was about halfway up the wall I stopped and looked down. I was far enough now. I looked around and spotted a beetle blade watching me from the side of the wall.

"Are you happy now?" I yelled at it knowing the creators were watching me with it. "Do you like seeing us suffering like this? Do you like watching us die one-by-one? I hope you all burn in hell for the pain and torture you put us all through!" I wanted them to stop all of this and just let us live a normal life.

I took a deep breath ready to jump, but before I did I said, "Ivy, I am so sorry. I know you would not want me to do this, you would want me to stay strong and help the greenies like you did. I just can't live any longer without you here with me. I love you. Always have, always will." Then I jumped.

When I hit the ground I felt as though my leg had been run over by a semi. This was not supposed to happed, I was supposed tp die instantly. I screamed in pain as I tried it move my leg. I heard some footsteps running towards me and then heard Alby's voice saying something incoherent.

He picked me up and started running back to the Glade. Every step he took was like someone stabbing me over and over. The courner of my vision started turning black as he made it back to the Glade. I heard Minho's voice right before I blacked out.

OoO

I woke up to a terrible pain and peeled my eyes open. After they adjusted to the light, I looked at my ankle. It was covered in a giant white bandage about four times the actual size of my ankle.

Alby and Minho burst through the door and started to talk at the same time. They both wanted to know what happened to me, and how I broke my leg. I told them the truth, and they both looked at me like I was nuts.

"Why on Earth would you do that Newt," asked Alby.

"Because," I said, "There is nothing left for me to live for."

"Nothing left for you to live for!?" Minho yelled, "You know as well as I do that Ivy would NOT want you to go jumping of a shucking wall because she died. She would want you to get your shuck ass out there, help the greenies, and make this place better for them."

"I know," I sighed, "But I just don't feel like living without her anymore. It is so upsetting. Everywhere I go there is a part of her there, even in the shucking maze."

Alby looked at me, "Yeah we know. She is everywhere, but that doesn't mean you should just go jumping off a wall. Now that Ivy is gone you need to take over her spot. You have to help people, and cheer up everyone."

"Yeah, ok. I'll do it for her, but what are we going to tell everyone else. We can't exactly tell them I jumped off a wall they might try to too," I stated.

"Yeah, um... we could tell them you thought there might be an exit at the top of the wall, but the vines broke once you got half way up," suggested Minho. We all nodded.

"Oh, and Clint says you will always have a limp from that jump." Alby informed me.

"Ugh, great a shucking way to remember what I did for the rest of my life. Peachy." I groaned.

When I could walk we told the rest of the Glade what "happened." I tried to cheer up the gloomy people and help the greenies as much as I could. We never told anyone else about Ivy. For she was Newt's ray of sunshine and his only love. He did not want to be reminded of her anymore that he had to be.

Then that fateful day when the creators send Teresa up in the Box. I was happy for Tommy, because he got someone to love, but I wished it was Ivy who came up not Teresa. Seeing Teresa made me very sad, but at the same time hopeful. Maybe now we could find a way out of the shucking maze. Maybe, then I could find Ivy again.

 ** _A/N I hoped you enjoyed the story, or cried, or both. Please review and tell me what you think. This was my first story and I want_ _to know what you guys think. I might do another chapter where Ivy is at WICKED watching Newt jump off the wall. Bye yo peeps._**


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